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The new beaver-faced BMW M3 and M4 are some of the ugliest automobiles on the road. I know, I’m hardly the first to say it. Bucktooth’d as it may be, that face hides the truly ghastly profile, proportions, and detail work. From an aesthetic perspective, the car has no redeeming qualities. Usually, before the world went crazy, making something a race car made it look better and cooler. With the new M4 GT3, it looks worse. More of an eye-gouge instead of an eyesore.

Image: BMW

Look at this thing. The fenders are radiused aggressively for aerodynamics reasons, and the wing is appropriately massive. Beyond those initial strikes, we still see the same featureless M4 side profile and detailing, along with added vents and gills, amounting to an even more grotesque looking machine

BMW tried to pull a little stunt on everyone here. The first image (above) shows the car at competition height and configuration. The prettier staged studio photos have the car absolutely dumped to the ground, with the hectic fitment befitting a ’90s BTCC car. Look at it below:

Image: BMW

This is a flattering angle of an unflattering car, with some careful prep done to make it look fine. This still isn’t great, and I’m doing my best to look past my love of very low race cars. Truth is, we won’t see them in the wild like this. From this angle, I could almost confuse it with the M6 GT3, which is strange for a car that is much smaller. There’s still nothing BMW about it besides the livery. I could confuse this for any generic sports car. Hell, it could be an RC-F GT3.

What bothers me most about this ugly race car, is people using it to say “look the M4 doesn’t look so bad” or that the design is “growing on them.” How? Do you have eyes? This looks worse than the road car! This is before I even look at the smushed-beaver-cheeks face of the GT3. 

Image: BMW

Need I say more? That’s the terrible part we all know about. They gave it some cute headlight boomerang dimples and kept it as shocking as before. It’s hilarious that the faux vents above the grilles on the road-going M4 stay faux vents for the race car. Needless design detailing on a race car? What?

Image: BMW

Look at these ugly ducklings. I can’t decide which one I hate more. I seriously can’t see how the race car helps the road car’s street cred at all. Sure, it might be a highly competitive and competent race car, and the road car might be incredibly fast and capable. It doesn’t mean I couldn’t take a baseball bat to the bodywork and end up with something prettier. Hell, I want to take a baseball bat to it anyways.

I’ll spare you looking at any more photos of the thing. I sure as hell don’t want to. Stop excusing the ugliness of both cars. They deserved better. 

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